[x]

Does that make me Different?I wear make up. Does that make me fake?
I cry. Does that make me emo?
I have male friends. Does that make me slutty?
I smile a lot. Does that make me weird?
I laugh loud. Does that make me preppy?
I have anxiety. Does that make me a freak?
I have Bipolar Disorder. Does that make me abnormal?
I respect people. I change for me, and only me. I have a past, but I know I have a future.
Does that make me different?
Maybe.
But at least it makes me
Me.

RelapseIt’s like counting
Saturn’s rings,
hash marks
along your limbs -
remembering a time
when

‘just one more’

made you feel better.

- & you’re sitting there
wondering why
Draco, stuck in limbo
always looks like he’s

falling.

FrostbiteNumbness
I can’t feel my toes and at first I think
It’s just my toes.
I can cover them up.
I can warm them.

It spreads, like fire,
Like ice.
I glance away for a second, it seems, and my feet are cold
Pat –pat
That’s funny, I didn’t feel that
Maybe I’ll cover them up too
I’ll warm them up.

I’ll take a nap
Maybe a short rest will make it all better, warm them
Up…
What’s that? How long has it been?
My legs… are you still mine..
Why has my breath left me, short?
Has everything but deserted me?

What about you, are you still here?
Are you still with me?
Hello?
And before I can say goodbye, I think my thoughts are leaving me too –

Sleeping Beautyshe’s in love with a character who
never existed but in the labyrinth of her head:
a patchwork composition of beautiful, lengthy words
she’d heard in her catatonic state; coma living
day in and day out, reliant on the salvation
of a man made of foreign wishing
and imperfection and necessity – an ignorance
of the less than ideal perception of self she’d
come to fear, absention stained romantic to the point
where daydreams were a standard for survival

(real living is for the purposeful of heart,
he loves her in her sleep)

UneditedWe cry.
We scream.
We fight for our dream.

We scream.
We cry.
We're just waiting to die.

The same emotions
with a different drive.
Sometimes dead, sometimes alive.

The same in one way,
different in another
brother and sister, sister and brother.

So close in feeling,
so different in the end.
Falling apart, or finally on the mend?

Which am I?
Will I ever know?
Fighting to stay or ready to go?

Maybe I'm both,
in some impossible way.
Emotions oddly mixed everyday.

Wouldn't surprise.
I'm such a freak.
Excuse me, I laugh, I should call it "unique"

WorthlessWorthless,
the name that cuts like a knife,
Me,
it's all that you see inside,
My heart,
is breaking with every breath I take
The lies,
the only thing I can't seem to face.

Happily AloneHonesty,
She does not have,
Personalities,
She has many of them.

A million shields,
a million personalities,
She's always changing,
to fit every person around her.

If one were to ask why,
she would answer with,
I will never reveal my weaknesses,
because she's evil.

She hates everyone,
stupider than her is barely tolerable,
smarter than her is too scary,
She hates it all.

She leaves the world behind,
To one she has dreamt of,
No color,
nobody else.

Then,
she will smile,
why,
because she is truly happy alone.

She is not evil,
She does not hate you,
She is not dishonest,
She simply wants to be alone.

wallflower clippingsthere's scar tissue in her throat,
swollen around the words she never said;
dark rings around her eyes
like planets unremembered, and
a staleness to her touch,
the crystalline Dead Sea.

she's living like a story
that's already been told
"if no one loved you
would you mean anything at all?"

in that moment,
we forget to exist.

We are the King and Queen of Broken DreamsStanding still in a mine field, staring at all we have left.
We were so young, we didn’t stop to think.
Now we’re in a car crash, teetering on the brink.
If you were to leave me now, I don’t know what I’d do.

It was a whirl wind romance,
A light when all was black, a spark of something when all was bleak.
You swept me off my feet and made me feel brand new.
I thought we could live forever and I’m certain you did to.

We built a house without foundations
And now we’re falling down,
Everything’s crumbling around us, time slipping through out fingertips.
People used to walk past us but they were to drunk to see,
That our lives are coming apart around us, there is no light as far as we can see.

There was no fire to start with,
Just two broken things, the world had left behind.
The casualties of other people’s dreams of power, money and control,
Spat out onto the curb to rot away and die.
We never stood a chance or so

Battle in my MindEat.
Don't eat.
Take it easy.
Work out until you pass out.
Get help.Tell someone.
Keep it a secret. It's only for you and me.
You're perfect.
You're worthless.
You're beautiful.
You're disgusting.
Why won't you listen?
They don't understand.
Let me help you.
You don't understand.
Show me.
No!
I love you..

In The Daylight

In The Daylight

A false downfall
An unexpected revival

Sunset to moonset
Shining through darkness

Life...redefined
Death...redesigned

In the valley of promises- I will fear no end
On the brink of weakness- I will ascend
-
Roads of the toughest
Paths of the darkest

I conditioned my flawed limits
So fearful memories won't be paralytic

I had to raise my own spirit
Strength and endurance become so vivid

A chance for change / A moment of fate
A time to make peace / A brief feeling of creed
A sealing of my slate / A silencing of my mistakes
A secret ready to be freed / A chain soon-to-be incomplete

Pain and peace are infinite
Judge the wrat

Falling off the EdgeDo you know what it feels like?
To nearly fall off the edge,
but not quite...
just so that you're dangling;
clinging for your worthless life
lest it fall into the sea of loneliness.
Your callused, pink fingers turning
to a shade of purplish-red of pain
as it does it best to hold on.

Splash.

In the sea of loneliness,
everything is crisp, translucent.
There is nothing around you,
you are alone...
unlike other people,
you have no one
clamouring to save you;
you have no one
diving in to get you out.

There is no point
screaming for help,
you will only waste
the little time and air you have left.
You only have the darkness
of the sea envelop

of seafoam thronesFrom Atlas’ hands she wept to me,
atop Africas and South Atlantics;

this is one situation unaffected by
ember eyes and windy lashes
(it has no anatomy).

You are sparrows stranded
in tiny crevices and cliffside love,
though you rebuke flight
in the fear of chipping feathers.

So what do you do?

You reach for my soul,
coveting flight with shaking
dainty arms…

and perhaps I’ll let you:
With flytrap lips and
glass shaped hips…
you are unfit for anything but
sight.

(But beauty isn’t everything)

Honesty Written

from the

heart.

No eraser.

Her SideTomorrow she'll be gone,
but what can you say?
Nothing can help her.
The pain won't go away.

But she would've stopped,
you could've said no.
That's what she wanted,
someone to say don't go.

That someone wanted her,
or at least would try.
That someone would grieve
if she were to die.

But you just stared,
nodding your head,
and she realized the truth
with a feeling of dread.

No one wanted her.
No one cared.
Not even you,
with the the love you shared.

So she said good-bye,
and you watched her leave.
She may have had the rope,
but now you can't breathe.

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Leave or DieLay down your verbal hunting knife
Embrace the facts so blunt
Reject the pleasure born of strife
Abandon this personal hunt

You want to rip the prey you stalk apart
To introduce the beast to death
This time please try to have a heart
Allow them to retain their breath

Though you want to rip their heart right out
Sometimes it's better to show mercy
Don't waste your time skinning the lout
Just this once let them go free

If they return then you can put them down
Only a fool would stick around
In a sea of pain they'll have to drown
Before you place them underground

It's a dangerous game for them to play
A game that will leave them

A Matter of TimeThe world is shifting beneath my feet
Giving shape to an undeniable future
One so intricate in it's simplicity
If only the page would turn faster

I have many things to experience still
Each adventure adds to this story of mine
These winds of change are a breath of life
Blowing my ship in the right direction

This time the journey will end well
Just this once my future is set in stone
Alternatives are simply unacceptable
In my heart I know how the story ends

I'm not quite sure how to explain this feeling
But this sensation puts me at ease
An indescribable peace fills my being
Bringing my soul a comforting sense of clarity

Perhap

Suicidal DreamI'm fading in and out
Consumed by pain and doubt
I never thought it'd come to this
I guess I'll go without

Now I'm coming undone
The collapse has just begun
If you don't want to be buried
Then I suggest you start to run

I'd feel so much better
Had we gone on forever
All I wanted was reality born of dreams
But it seems that cannot be
And these facts all torture me
Now I've pushed everyone away
So they don't have to hear my screams

Somehow I'm still alive
After trying not to survive
Lately fate hasn't liked me
The end of life just won't arrive

I'm mocked by every breath I take
By the very fact I'm awake
Though I know I can

Lost and AloneFor once I don't know where to go
There are no directions
I find myself stranded and searching
Trying to escape this wasteland

Once upon a time I possessed a map
A guide to get me through
But it's been taken away from me
And now I wander lost and alone

I'm trying to find my way once more
But I keep going in circles
Searching for a what I've lost
Looking for my salvation

What I lost is nowhere to be found
This fact makes my heart ache
Because what I had was irreplaceable
Now I'm left with only memories

Remnants of something so beautiful
Something more valuable then air
If only I could piece them together
I'd lose myself in

Uncomfortably NumbSensation fades as the cold creeps in
The fire within cannot go out
Emotions collide within my heart
I become uncomfortably numb

More then anything I crave the fire
That one flame who makes me whole
Each tear in my eye becomes an icicle
Cutting my skin as it plummets

Feeling far away makes me feel so cold
Honestly I can't feel a thing
Being disconnected is my personal nightmare
One that kills me every time

All I want is the warmth to embrace me
And burn frostbitten fears away
This numb sensation is my greatest pain
A sickness with just one remedy

Only she can stoke the fire inside
Nobody else sets me ablaze
There is no othe

Separation IssuesWhen you're gone away I feel hollow
Despair reels me right in
It's so much more then I can swallow
Without you I am lost within

Over time my insides become cold
My fiery heart feels so weighed down
The demons in my head grow very bold
In my own despair I drown

I can't fight these feelings of withdrawal
You are my one and only drug
The longer you're gone the further I fall
Into the pit that time has dug

This heart can't make it on it's own
Your importance is on par with breathing
Things fall apart when I'm alone
I'm so down one might think I'm grieving

All I need is a be reconnected to you
Once I am everything feels alright
I

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Love Like No Other

by ~AzialSilvara, Jun 30, 2012, 1:14:37 AM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

It's not easy raising a child alone
But right now I'm all she's got
For her sake I sweat the small stuff
Because her future means a lot

I'm investing in my daughters life
Trying each day to give my best
Her happiness means the world to me
Despite the chaos I know I'm blessed

There are times that I am tired
But her needs I place before my own
I'll always work my ass off for her sake
This is a fact that's set in stone

Watching her grow up makes it worth it
Seeing her learning makes me proud
She knows that I'll always love her
Each day I say those words aloud

Raising a child alone isn't easy
That doesn't mean it can't be done
Someday I'll look back on this with pride
Acknowledging the war I've won

Love Like No Otherby ~AzialSilvara

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

Love is a very powerful thing. It'll drive people to do things they wouldn't normally do. People will go extraordinary lengths to find it, or reach it. There are many different kinds of love, many ways to love. But the love a parent has for their child is a love like no other. The love of a single parent is especially powerful.

I wrote this for a single mother who happens to be a friend of mine. The topic really makes you think.. Single parents sacrifice so much, they work that much harder, and many people don't see that. Most people don't understand how difficult it truly is. It's a sad thing. But parents like this, the ones who can make it.. they are the strongest parents of all.

!youdeservethetruth Jun 30, 2012

I've never read anything so, so beautiful before. This poem will touch your friend deeply. What a blessing.. to have a friend like You.

~AzialSilvara Jun 30, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

She cried.

Sometimes inspiration hits you and you just have to run with it.

!youdeservethetruth Jul 1, 2012

.. let it run because it's beautiful. It's perfect.

~Kitty-Kitty-Kit-Kat Jun 30, 2012 Hobbyist Photographer

beautiful

~AzialSilvara Jun 30, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

Thank you!

~Kitty-Kitty-Kit-Kat Jul 2, 2012 Hobbyist Photographer

ur welcome

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Love Like No Other

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